Dude, Where's My Baby

So does life suck when your baby has multiple seizures every day?  Let me give an example:  Wake up to your baby pawing at your chest, cuddle with your baby, she's so sweet...you nurse her, you smile at her, you realize you have to change her diaper and give her some medicine.  Just as you are about to get up out of bed----- her eyes glaze over.  Her face changes.  Suddenly she looks high.  You wonder if this is really happening...she is not 'happy', she looks HIGH unlike what a baby should ever look like!  Then her eyes roll back in her head and she freezes.  Her whole body sticks straight out and she goes stiff.  Then her mouth starts doing a weird jiggly thing.  She starts to smack her lips at the same time that her limbs start jerking violently.  SHIT!  You start to react.  Where are her meds?  This isn't your first rodeo.  Grab her, hold her on her left side.  Make sure her mouth is clear.  Is she breathing?  (So hard to tell since she turns blue and her breathing slows down to almost nothing).  You put the pill in her mouth and dissolve it between her lip and gum. Oh God.  She will be fine.  She will be fine.  You start your mantra.  "I need you, I love you, STAY HERE!  I need you, I love you.  STAY HERE."  Over and over until it's over.  And she goes limp.  She goes unconscious.  You breathe.  You don't breathe.  You call her doctor.  Her doctor knows NOTHING that will change her life.  You love her.  You love her.  You love her.