I Hate Dinner Anything Part II

I found this website for making meals and freezing them to reheat later when you don't feel like cooking.

I believe in baby steps, so I am trying out the Baby Menu.  Actually, let me be honest.  I hate cooking (that has been established) so I had the Nanny, whom is a Godsend-BTW, try out the Baby Menu.

So far, it has been awesome.  Here is a link if you are interested in it yourself.

Once A Month Mom

Organization?

I've been meaning to and planning to and dreaming of getting organized for YEARS!  Now that I have help around the house and with the girls (thank God for her) I think it's time to actually, finally DO IT!

So I've been scouring the internet and of course my beloved Pinterest while I nurse Charliedoll and this is what I found:

A Bowl Full of Lemons

So I am officially going to try to perform her tasks and do her organizing challenge.  Hopefully I can get it together and actually do it.

I Hate Dinner Anything

Let me preface this post by captioning the photographic evidence above by saying that I can cook.  My food tastes good and I know what I am doing in the kitchen, so to speak.

To reiterate the post title...  I Hate Dinner Anything.  I hate planning, shopping, cutting or thinking of cutting coupons. I hate chopping, boiling, roasting, frying.  I hate it ALL.  Thinking of making dinner is enough to put me in a bad mood.  I am close to a few women who "love to cook".  I envy them tremendously, bless them.  I am not such a woman.  I hate feeding myself.  I hate feeding my family.  If I could hire a full time chef and live in a two bedroom apartment I would.  Ok, I think you are starting to get the picture.  Cooking + Me= not friends.

I don't even like eating food I have prepared.  Even if it is something I normally (meaning normally someone else prepares my food) love to eat and find to be delicious.  I really just don't enjoy it.

I love food when it's prepared for me.  I daydream about food.  I look on food websites and Pinterest all sorts of food.  And then I dream about someone else making it for me.  I know all the good spots and restaurants. Sadly, I bet if you asked my girls what they wanted to eat, they would probably name eateries or a location, not an actual food.

Right now I should have cooked dinner, but it's 7:38 and I am having my eldest daughter look in the freezer for something to microwave so I don't have to order pizza or wake up the baby and go through a drive through.  I could make some pasta, side of veggies or a salad.  But that sounds like a really horrible experience for me.

I know I can't be the only person with this kind of cooking aversion.  Maybe I'll Google it and see if I can work some "self-help" magic.

Dude, Where's My Baby

So does life suck when your baby has multiple seizures every day?  Let me give an example:  Wake up to your baby pawing at your chest, cuddle with your baby, she's so sweet...you nurse her, you smile at her, you realize you have to change her diaper and give her some medicine.  Just as you are about to get up out of bed----- her eyes glaze over.  Her face changes.  Suddenly she looks high.  You wonder if this is really happening...she is not 'happy', she looks HIGH unlike what a baby should ever look like!  Then her eyes roll back in her head and she freezes.  Her whole body sticks straight out and she goes stiff.  Then her mouth starts doing a weird jiggly thing.  She starts to smack her lips at the same time that her limbs start jerking violently.  SHIT!  You start to react.  Where are her meds?  This isn't your first rodeo.  Grab her, hold her on her left side.  Make sure her mouth is clear.  Is she breathing?  (So hard to tell since she turns blue and her breathing slows down to almost nothing).  You put the pill in her mouth and dissolve it between her lip and gum. Oh God.  She will be fine.  She will be fine.  You start your mantra.  "I need you, I love you, STAY HERE!  I need you, I love you.  STAY HERE."  Over and over until it's over.  And she goes limp.  She goes unconscious.  You breathe.  You don't breathe.  You call her doctor.  Her doctor knows NOTHING that will change her life.  You love her.  You love her.  You love her.

Shit Luck

EFFing eplipsy.

"Are you kidding me?  Are you seriously telling me my little baby has epilepsy????  Oh my God!!!!!!! What the fuck kind of shit luck is this????"

That is what I feel like screaming from a mountain top or something right now.  I want to scream.  I want to sob for days.  Mommy is sick of this shit.  Mommy is tired of the shit storm.  But Mommy has to take care of everyone and keep everyone happy and relaxed.  Meanwhile I am effing screaming in my head.  "HOLY SHIT!!!!  Fuck You, epilepsy!!  Stop fucking with my baby.  And leave us alone, shit luck!"

So, I figure a project that doesn't have anything to do with anything would be some good therapy.  And after a few trips out of town and to the hospital, etc.  I realize we are carrying too many bags, and Mr. can never find anything in the actual diaper bag we have.  It is also just hard to access everything in the bag we have now.  The gusseted pockets would be useful if we didn't have so much stuff in the main compartment.  It just takes forever to get to anything, it's a real pain in the butt.

Right before I had Charlotte, I bought a diaper bag at Target.  I just picked the cutest print in the biggest bag they had.  Silly me.  After all, this isn't my first rodeo, you'd think I'd have learned how important a diaper bag is.  I blame my scrambled pregnancy brain.

This is the bag:

Spark by Skip Hop Loft in Poppy

It's not available anymore, so I will be listing it on Ebay to help pay for my new bag.

These are the bags I am trying to decide between:

Ju Ju Be BFF in either Marvelous Mums or Powder Icing

Or JJ Cole System 180 in either Navy Drop or Vintage Poppy which is NOT available until September.

 Vintage Poppy

 Blue Vine

 Navy Drop

Interior Mommy Flap (shown in Black Damask)

Decisions, decisions... and at these prices, I better make the right one this time!

What Seizure?

Just a few hours after her second seizure...back to her happy self.

As for her parents...forget about it.  We are a mess.  We look a mess, act a mess and it's just a big ass mess. Life is so difficult.  All daily mundane tasks seems so silly.  I just want to stare at my baby and make sure she is ok.  I want to go back in time, to when we never, ever, ever thought our baby could have a seizure, when it never crossed our minds.  Now it's all we think about.  Okay but look at this picture!!! Can you believe these two!!! That baby is pretty much exactly what he asked for.  She looks exactly like him, but with my eyes....hahahahaha brown wins again.

Charlotte's First Seizure

I never could have imagined ever typing the title of this post.  Charlotte, my baby, has had two seizures.  There is so much stress and confusion and frustration when your child has a medical problem.  I'm not the only one to ever go through this, but sometimes it feels as if I am so alone.

 Her first seizure was so terrible.  I thought she was going to die when she stopped breathing and turned blue.  It led us to call 911.  We got to a private hospital by ambulance, the hospital she was born at.  Big mistake.  I will call that hospital #1..., but that is a misnomer because it's not #1, it sucks so bad I can't even relive the pure bullshit they put us through to write it here.

 We ended up having to leave and drive to another hospital 45 minutes away.  Hospital #2.  We were there because I was so stressed out, I had gotten the wrong directions from Google and drove to the wrong hospital.  That led Charlotte to have to be transferred by ambulance to the correct hospital...hospital #3.

Charlotte was there to be observed after what the Dr.'s at hospital #2 & #3 called  an ALTE- Apparent Life Threatening Event.  We stayed for almost 24 hours and then were released.  

The worst test by far was the EEG.  Not because of the actual test, it's painless, but for two other reasons:  Sadly, Charlotte seems to have my tolerance for medication and came out of sedation right as she was supposed to be getting her test done.  They had to re sedate her.  Also, She had to go without eating for 5 hours.  Poor baby was starving.  I was a pacing, blithering, crying mess as the sweet nurses tried to administer the second sedation meds.  Charlotte was inconsolable.  I just couldn't stand it.  Seeing my child so upset, so hungry, so confused and needing me...and I could do nothing but break down.

Finally, she was alseep and the EEG tech let me hold her while he gave her the test.  This hospital knows exactly how to take care of parents and children.  I am so thankful we ended up there.

All in all, Charlotte had a blood test, a CT scan, and an EEG.

First Fitted Diapers

We have just discovered something awesome in our Cloth Diaper Adventure.  Fitted Diapers. Yes, I realize I am over capitalizing.  I'm excited.

I found these pre owned fitted diapers at an awesome little baby consignment store that just opened down town.  I'm hooked.  I want more!  The yellow one is made by GoodMama and the pink one is Twinkie Tush. Twinkie Tush, it turns out, is very hard to procure.  You have to be really lucky to be able to buy one for $35.    I feel pretty lucky to have just stumbled upon one in the store.

Sweet Ride

Charlotte's 8 month birthday present was a pink GT cruiser walker.  

❥

It arrived a little early (thanks Amazon!) so Mr. put it together and she took her first ride.
❥

Sleepy Sisters

This used to happen all the time with Munch and Em.  So sweet to see Em and Charlie like this.  Melts my heart.

Her Monkey

What can I say...this is just so cute.   

Morning Baby

She wakes up so happy, and makes my day.  I can't wait to see her smile every morning when I open my eyes.  

Pool Day

Em's class had a fun day at the Pool. It was overcast and cold, but that didn't stop most of them!

Ready, Steady...

For a few weeks it looks like she's getting ready for crawling, but she just rocks back and forth and doesn't go forward.  She is scooting backwards and rolling.  She is on the move...

What Else...

Washing the car ourselves sounded like fun and a good way to save money on a car wash.  It was fun, but I think a car wash is still in order.

Em Makes Dinner

Here is the dinner Em made for her family...sweet girl.  It was so good.

Em's Room Redo

Some inspiration I found on pinterest: